Creating the Right Atmosphere (To Set the Mood)

Familiarity can make us lazy or complacent, and many people don’t put in as much effort to create an inviting sexual environment in a long-term relationship. However, if you make an effort just like you did back when you were single, you’ll likely find that sex happens more often.

The atmosphere in the room is an important factor when it comes to having a satisfying and enjoyable sexual experience - and making the phyiscal environment comfy and inviting is one way to do it. A comfortable and inviting physical environment can foster an atmosphere of care, intimacy, and mutual pleasure. This allows partners to relax and focus on the pleasurable, intimate aspects of sex; The more comfortable you and your partner(s) feel, the easier it will be for everyone to have a good time. When people feel safe and comfortable, it often allows for a deeper connection with the other(s).

Creating an inviting physical environment can also help increase arousal and intensify pleasure by offering visual cues. For example, dim lighting, various textures, and sensual scents can all act as triggers to heighten arousal and pleasure. Having your physical environment represent your desires and needs can help you become more confident in yourself and your sexuality as well, while reducing potential discomfort, such as body insecurities or performance anxiety.  

Research backs this up: Couples who take more time to set the scene or establish a mood are more sexually satisfied.

Here’s how you can set up the atmosphere before sex;

1. Clear the Space: Dirty sheets aren’t an aphrodisiac, nor is a messy bedroom. So make sure the room is clean, free of clutter, and free of distractions. Having a clear space free of distractions will help ensure that everyone can focus on each other and their physical pleasure.

2. Dim The Lights: Having sex in total darkness means you can’t look into each other’s eyes or enjoy the visuals, but at the same time, having sex in a brightly light room can make some people self-conscious. Strike a happy medium and dim the lights or put some cute neon lights.

3. Set the Temperature: It's hard to get hot and bothered when it's cold as ice in there! Another important step before sex is making sure the temperature is comfortable for both partners. If the room is too hot or too cold, it can make it difficult for one or both partners to stay aroused and remain focused on their physical pleasure.

4. Make a Playlist: Not only can music relax sexual inhibitions, but it has also been shown to reduce stress, which can hinder sexual arousal and pleasure. Listening to music during sex can curb nervousness and distract an individual from negative thoughts and, also, it can stimulate several happy hormones in our brain!

5. Use Candles, Essential Oils or Perfume: Candles and essential oils can help fill the room with a pleasant aroma and a peaceful ambiance, which can add to the physical pleasure. You can also put your favorite perfume on yourself or on your sheets or even try a pheromone perfume to see what effect it will have!

You don’t have to do all of these things at the same time, of course—just think about how you can capitalize on all of your senses (and your partner’s senses) to make the atmosphere almost perfect and to take your sex life to another level!